Blog: Making Wise Choices

UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – 3 MAIN THINGS

Posted: April 15, 2011

Once the chemical magic wears off in a relationship, we get into the nuts and bolts of what makes us tick. There has to be more to a fulfilling home life than the grinding routine of vacuuming dog hairs, running children to soccer, paying the mortgage and fertilizing the grass. If we don’t know what makes our spouses’ hearts pound, gives them fulfillment and spurs them on to become better people, we miss the mark in what marriage was intended to be. One of the hardest questions we will ask each other is this, “What are your 3 greatest needs?” We may actually think this is a dumb, easy question, but in fact it is the most essential one you will ever ask your spouse AND yourself. We all have deep emotional needs, physical, spiritual needs, that if they are not met, we will slowly die inside. So first ask…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Encouragement, Expectations, Friendship, Good Marriage, Intimacy, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Pain Pleasure

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – Pain or Pleasure

Posted: April 1, 2011

Humans seek pleasure. Most people believe that this essential pleasure will be found in a marriage relationship and that it will ultimately fulfill their soul craving for acceptance, understanding and of course…love. This powerful, plan was created by God and He said that “it was good.” Something has gone awry, or has it? For the next few months I will be writing on K.I.S.S. (Keep it simple sweetheart) simple, yet powerful steps to build the kind of marriage that God intended us to enjoy. Marriages can indeed be the joyful, fulfilling relationships God intended them to be. I was married at nineteen, a young clueless woman, thinking that my husband would make me happy and enrich my life. I had no one to mentor, or teach me as to what it takes to build a marriage. I went through years of resentment, pain and feeling I had made a dreadful…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Expectations, Good Marriage, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Pain Pleasure, Resentment

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BEAUTY TIP #38 – CHOOSE…and Your Feelings Will Follow

Posted: March 26, 2011

We are obsessed with knowledge.  Then why, to recapture an old phrase, are we “going to hell in a hand basket?” I won’t list all the statistics and atrocities; but you know from your own area of influence what I’m talking about. We seem to be getting smarter but yet insensible. The answer is really quite simple. Knowledge without action = zero.  When we come to an intersection in life that begs action, simply knowing the right answer but not doing anything about it perpetuates more pain, rejection, disappointment, anger, and resentment. As Albert Einstein said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” You can talk about writing a book year after year, but if you don’t hit the SEND button on your computer, you will never know if you will be a published author. You can speak endlessly about being a better mother,…

Posted in: Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, Fear, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Friendship, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Resentment

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BEAUTY TIP #37 – “Wide Awake and Curious”

Posted: March 16, 2011

Many of my readers know that I have shown up at work wearing two different shoes. Obviously I was still sleepwalking. I had a boss that constantly reminded me, “The best way to succeed is to PAY ATTENTION to the details.” That expression resonated in my brain and to this day I focus on having a curious perspective on life. Try to focus in on details when you are on an airplane flying at 30,000 feet. All you can see is blotches, lines and squares. Travelling on a hi-speed bullet train in France allows you to see clearer outlines and pictures but no details. Driving slower in a car; is better. Walking is good. Stopping is vital. We have to remember that to succeed, emerge and blossom in our spiritual journey we have to pay attention and “taste and see that the Lord is good…” (Psalm 34:8 NIV).  SEE AND…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty Unleashed, Encouragement, Expectations, Finding Truth, Freedom from Busyness, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles

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BEAUTY TIP #36 – Loneliness

Posted: February 25, 2011

These words made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. Loneliness is ignorance. What an irreverent and accusing comment about one of the most painful and heart wrenching human conditions.  This citation (which came out of a commentary) had such a huge impact on me that I chose to study it in greater depth to try to understand the author’s point of view.  It has been a startling revelation. Loneliness is in fact ignorance. We were created to be connected to our Heavenly Father and to other people; that is the only way we can function in this world if we want to live fulfilling, joyful lives.  Nature abhors a vacuum and will do anything to fill it.  Water flows into any empty crevice.  Fires explode with a vengeance when it has produced a vacuum. When you and I are hungry we need food. When our souls…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, Finding Truth, Friendship, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Fear, Overcoming Struggles, Resentment, Uncategorized

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BEAUTY TIP #35 – Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Posted: February 18, 2011

January is an insane month in the gym; people are falling all over each other in the cycling classes, racquet ball court, on the cardio machines and pumping iron. There is a tension and a determined resolution to get in shape and become a “new you” after the Christmas over-indulgence. I can only surmise that many of those people looked in the mirror on January 2nd and were horrified at what they saw. With their new runners and their fancy new Adidas bag, they are off to the gym to make that much needed dramatic change.  It is only February 18th and right now you can shoot a canon in the gym and you wouldn’t hurt anyone. What happened to all the enthusiastic people who wanted their new bodies? I can just imagine the language in their head, “I had no idea it would be such hard work; I’m too…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Friendship, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles

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BEAUTY TIP #34 – Sand in my Shoes

Posted: January 29, 2011

The feeling of being barefoot and squishing sand between my toes evokes a giddiness of freedom. If I nudge near the ocean just near enough to get the occasional splash of gorgeous, turquoise sea water, and the sun warming my cheeks; I feel like a child again. Free to frolic, run, laugh and giggle. Being barefoot in the sand unleashes a brazen abandon that I find in no other place. I cannot get this freedom when I wear shoes. It is blatantly unrealistic of me to think that I can frolic in the sand and not expect to get sand in my shoes. Those irritating grains of sand that will find that little crevice and rub away at me until I either take off my shoes or leave the beach. Annoying, hurtful and disappointing!  An unrealistic expectation is like an irritating grain of sand-a silent thief that will rob us…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Expectations, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Resentment

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BEAUTY TIP #33 “Radiance”

Posted: January 21, 2011

I yearn to be radiant. Not the kind where I walk into a room with the perfect outfit, a forced smile and all the right answers; but a radiance that has the effervescent glow of something more powerful, beautiful. I crave a radiance that does not scream my obvious striving, or cover my messiness and grittiness. I am helpless to attain this but I am on journey and quest to find it.  Every morning I start by talking to God about my plans for the day and off I go to embrace the day with a smile on my face.  Grittiness sets it.  I get irritated, people let me down, and I compare and feel insignificant and wonder if I will ever get it right. I’m not the only one; I hear weary sighs and laments from people everywhere. Demands and expectations have clogged our days and we lose sight…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, Expectations, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Freedom from Busyness, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Fear

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BEAUTY TIP #31 – “Could be Trouble”

Posted: December 11, 2010

On of our favorite activities is whitewater rafting on the Flathead River, Montana, in June when the water level is high from the snow run off. After slipping on our wet suits and unsightly water shoes, we all grin at each other as we sit and wait for the guides to finish giving us our instructions.  “Beware”, they say, “of a sucking, swirling mass of water that churns like a rotary beater. Especially be aware of the eddy called Could be Trouble.”              As we start out, I make sure my feet are tucked tightly under the ropes as we all begin to paddle furiously to guide the raft through the boiling water and away from the swirling eddies.  Then I see it and my heart starts to palpitate. Black, angry water that is swirling, boiling and the roar is deafening. I know we have encountered the most dangerous of…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Fear, Overcoming Struggles

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BEAUTY TIP #29 – Beyond my horrible, very bad day.

Posted: November 19, 2010

  Heartbreak seems to come in clusters. When one door is slammed shut, I courageously get over it, get on with life because I know there is something better up ahead. The eternal optimist and believer of good things-that’s me. But when I continually encounter lost dreams, divorce and sickness in the family, an ailing mother, shut down plans and the occasional vertigo; the energy and zest starts to evaporate. I need something powerful to hang on to.  This last Labour Day weekend (2010), as I was walking through the vineyards with my son, we encountered the most gorgeous, unusual hidden treasure. Tucked away in one of the rows of grapes was a banquet table; complete with fine china, wine glasses, fresh fruit, gorgeous colored napkins and table runners and beautiful orange shawls thrown over the backs of the chairs.  I blinked twice to grasp the enormity of this picturesque…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Encouragement, Expectations, Finding Truth, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles

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