Blog: Fear

Surviving the “Land Between”

Posted: March 6, 2017

It’s a strange and raw place…that “land between.” It’s a lonely and dry desert; caught between our old normal and longing for our glorious destination. It could be a myriad of things that brought us there like divorce, bankruptcy, death, move or any other painful loss. What once was familiar is gone, and the unknown future looks bleary, sad and perhaps even hopeless. You and I don’t want to be like the Israelites wandering around in the desert for 40 years lamenting the meat and melons they left behind and yet fearful to embrace their promised land. While we are in that dry and lonely place, how do we move toward the hazy horizon to make our new destination a glorious reality? The “land between” is a hard place. In the last four months of my grieving journey I have seen and experienced many glimmers of hope for my good…

Posted in: Fear, God's promises, grief, Hope, pain, pray, Prayer, rest, time

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – When you don’t know what to do.

Posted: February 17, 2012

My husband Jack and I have a blended family of 5 children, and 9 grandchildren. They are all active, energetic ambitious people and they either go to school or live in different cities all across Canada and parts of the United States. We feel very helpless when our children call us and let us know there is some kind of trouble; perhaps illness, struggles in school, feeling overwhelmed, financial breakdown or a divorce. We feel vulnerable because we are not there to help them. Fourteen years ago, this feeling of helplessness caused us to make a decision that has empowered our lives in a way we could never have imagined. Jack and I made a radical, bold choice to meet each morning for bible reading and prayer. We could never have anticipated the beauty and power of our morning encounters.  The bible tells us that: “The earnest prayer of a…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Communication, Encouragement, Fear, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Life of Jesus, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Overwhelmed and Undervalued, Prayer, Respect, Tension, Uncategorized, Understanding each other, Valued

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – The “Stop-Start” Walk

Posted: January 6, 2012

This message is not for the faint of heart. But if you are on a quest to radically enrich your marriage and family relationships; proceed with caution and equip yourself with a willing and eager attitude. I am not an advocate of New Year’s resolutions; but I am a big believer in the fact that our life’s journey is enriched when we are willing to embrace that we need to constantly “learn and unlearn”. Here is one guaranteed way to achieve this. Every News Years Day my husband and I go for a long “New Years Walk”. On this sojourn we talk about the previous year; the blessings, joys, celebrations and what worked and what did not work. Then we move on to our hopes, dreams, desires for the coming year. We also discuss practical items; that we need a new dishwasher and we will probably have to replace the…

Posted in: Balancing life, Beauty through Boldness, Communication, Control, Encouragement, Expectations, Fear, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Freedom, Good Marriage, Intimacy, Kindness, Making Wise Choices, Patience, Resentment, Respect, Tension, Uncategorized, Understanding each other, Valued

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – When Life Squeezes You

Posted: November 22, 2011

“What comes out of you when life squeezes you?” I think about that quite a bit actually, because I’ve had a bit of “squeezing” going on in my life. No matter how I act, or “fake it until I make it”…when life squeezes me, the REAL ME SHOWS UP! It’s not always pretty, but it is the truth. How does this reality affect your marriage; because life can be tough. ©       You find out a child has an addiction. ©       The balance in the bank account is so much lower than you anticipated. ©       You find out your spouse had an affair, or a friend deceived you. ©       Your career change is so much harder than anticipated. ©       Your spouse will not take on spiritual leadership. ©       You found pornographic sites on your spouse’s computer. ©       Some you love-dies. ©       You lost your job. ©       You got a life threatening…

Posted in: Balancing life, Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Communication, Encouragement, Expectations, Fear, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Freedom, Friendship, Good Marriage, Intimacy, Kindness, Life of Jesus, Making Wise Choices, Obligations and Offenses, Overcoming Struggles, Pain Pleasure, Resentment, Respect, Tension, Uncategorized, Understanding each other

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – Manipulation or Influence

Posted: November 13, 2011

Women can be powerful, influential leaders in society; but especially in the home. From the time we were little girls, we have learned some tricks to getting what we want.  We may have heard words like, “Oh my, Susie you are so pretty.” So we learn to use our beauty to entice and meet our needs. Or we may have heard, “You are so smart…athletic…creative…happy…”, and then we may have learned to use these power tools to manipulate people to provide things to make us happy or to feel better about ourselves. Manipulation in a marriage has the potential to be a deadly tool that may end up boomeranging and cause built up resentment and hostility in your marriage and family. Manipulation:I once heard a well known speaker/author-namely Beth Moore, say that “Anything we have to manipulate is rarely ours to keep.” Those words have been seared into my soul…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty Unleashed, Communication, Control, Encouragement, Fear, Freedom, Friendship, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Kindness, Overcoming Struggles, Pain Pleasure, Resentment, Respect, Tension, Uncategorized, Understanding each other, Valued

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE-“Broken or Blended – Part 1”

Posted: September 18, 2011

I attended a beautiful, outdoor wedding ceremony this weekend. Tucked among tall poplar, birch and evergreen trees was a beautiful white archway wrapped in morning glory and rich, flowered vines.   Underneath this serene, sacred enchanting portico, a man and a beautiful woman said, “I do.” This was a second marriage for both of them. A second chance.  A new beginning. What joy to know that God gives us second chances for a beautiful life. My ears were perked. I wanted to pay close attention to the words that the clergy woman was saying; I wanted to hear the words of encouragement she would give for making a second marriage thrive. I have also been married for the second time and I am a great advocate for making it work the second time around. After all, who wants to go through more, uninvited pain? Then I heard the words that resonated…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty Unleashed, Communication, Encouragement, Expectations, Fear, Forgiveness, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Pain Pleasure, Patience, Resentment, Uncategorized, Understanding each other

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE –“Fences/Freedom – Part 1”

Posted: August 19, 2011

When someone in society breaks the law, the greatest punishment we can give them is to put them into prison. Lock them up; take away their freedom. Ask yourself this question right now, and try to visualize the answer; “What would my greatest freedom look like today?” If you have an answer to that question, let me ask you another question. “Is that picture of freedom within the boundaries of your marriage?” One of the greatest joys we can experience in this life is to be free in who God created us to be. Jesus Christ died on the cross to set us free from our self imposed prisons of guilt, shame and punishment. Yet, without realizing it, we create our own prisons in our marriages with that ugly word, control. To some degree we are all little control freaks. We have a vision of what life/marriage/husbands/children should look like,…

Posted in: Balancing life, Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty Unleashed, Communication, Control, Fear, Freedom, Freedom from Busyness, Friendship, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Kindness, Life of Jesus, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Resentment, Tension, Uncategorized, Understanding each other

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – Expectations

Posted: June 4, 2011

 Every one of us is a minefield full of treasures. Most of those minefields are pain, frustration, disappointment, bitterness and anger because of unmet expectations. So how does that turn into a treasure?  Follow me along on a treasure hunt. To do that I need to tell you a little story.  There was a man who ran across American, coast to coast. When he completed this arduous, compelling and harsh task, he was met by the news media, with TV cameras and microphones being shoved into his face. The reporters asked him, “What was the hardest part of this year long trek? Was it the heat in the summer? Was it the fatigue? Was it the loneliness? Was it the relentless distance?” The runner replied without any hesitation, “No, it was the sand in my shoes.”  Ok what does that have to do with expectations?  Everything! When we have expectations,…

Posted in: Balancing life, Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Beauty Unleashed, Communication, Encouragement, Expectations, Fear, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Friendship, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Kindness, Life of Jesus, Making Wise Choices, Pain Pleasure, Resentment

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BEAUTY TIP #38 – CHOOSE…and Your Feelings Will Follow

Posted: March 26, 2011

We are obsessed with knowledge.  Then why, to recapture an old phrase, are we “going to hell in a hand basket?” I won’t list all the statistics and atrocities; but you know from your own area of influence what I’m talking about. We seem to be getting smarter but yet insensible. The answer is really quite simple. Knowledge without action = zero.  When we come to an intersection in life that begs action, simply knowing the right answer but not doing anything about it perpetuates more pain, rejection, disappointment, anger, and resentment. As Albert Einstein said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” You can talk about writing a book year after year, but if you don’t hit the SEND button on your computer, you will never know if you will be a published author. You can speak endlessly about being a better mother,…

Posted in: Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, Fear, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Friendship, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Resentment

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