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Be a “Lifter Upper” – by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: September 17, 2023

Beware of the deadly 3 “D’s”. It starts with discouragement, catapults into despair and may end up in depression. Some how you’ve ventured into a dark cave and found there was no light to guide you out. Your aching body feels heavy and fatigued. Your mind is ruminating, you can’t focus and you keep chewing over the scene of your mess, failure, loss or disappointment. I know every one of you reading this has experienced at least one of the deadly “D’s”.  It’s a horrible place to be in, and we need to help one another getting out of our cave.

That’s where you come in. We all need to take part in being God’s hands and feet on earth to lift up those going through one of the 3 “D’s”. If you are the one going through one of the “D”s right now, I pray that someone reading this blog will jump in to rescue you from the cave. Here is how we can all help.

  1. SHOW UP. We need to know that we are not alone in this cave. When people ask me what to do when someone is going through a hard time, my first response is always, “Just show up!” After the death of both of my husbands, this was the greatest gift anyone could give me-just to show up and show me you care.
  2. COVER THEIR BACKS. There is a powerful story of a leader in the bible named Nehemiah. When he helped to rebuild the wall of the Holy City of Jerusalem he experienced some of the 3 D’s. When the wall was half finished, and the workers were exhausted; discouragement ran rampant. I love what he did. First he prayed. Then God gave him the wisdom to have someone cover every worker’s back. This was to encourage and protect them from harm. So be a “lifter upper” by covering your friend’s back and telling them you will cover them through the power of prayer. Say it and then do it.
  3. CHANGE THE WORDS. Our greatest enemy can be the lies we tell ourselves. We actually begin to believe that: We are worthless, hopeless, you’ve been overlooked, forgotten, why bother trying, just give up. We need someone to come alongside of us and help us change the lies for truth. God’s word reminds us: ”Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is” (Romans 12:2 NIV). Our cave may have become so dark and lonely that we have forgotten to change the way we think. We need someone to remind us and help us find the truth of the circumstance and hope for the future.
  4. HOLD UP. The bible tells us to: “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love: (Ephesians 4:2 NIV). The Greek meaning for bearing is to “hold up.” Sometimes we literally have to go and hold up our friends to make sure they are taking care of their bodies by eating properly, sleeping and getting dressed in the mornings. It may seem insignificant but so practical and drenched in love.
  5. PRAY. It sounds so simple, but if this was easy everyone would be doing it.It should be the first thing we do, but often it is the last thought on our cave agenda.  Prayer has the power to shatter the darkness of the cave and bring in the light. If you can’t pray for yourself, ask your friends to help.

Every one of us has a purpose on this earth. Perhaps today is your time to help someone with one of the deadly 3 “D’s”.



Posted in: adversity, ask for help, ask God, be a blessing, caves, companionship, cover each other's backs, darkness, depression, despair, disappointment, don't give up, Encouragement, failures, faulty thinking, feeling bad, Finding Truth, Friendship, Making Wise Choices, one-another, Overcoming Struggles, power of words, Prayer, rescue, seasons of darkness, self worth, show up, we need each other

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