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De-Clutter Your Marriage-9 Simple Ways

Posted: October 3, 2016

shoes-2One of these days I will de-clutter and re-organize my walk in closet. “One of those days” came on January 3 of this year when a portion of the closet broke away from the wall and dumped itself in the middle of the floor. As I sneezed through the attempt to rescue the drywall-covered mess, I came up with a plan.

This was my time to rid the closet of all unnecessary clutter. I threw the rest of the clothes on the floor and added to that pile all the “stuff” out of my bins. Then began the ruthless process of de-cluttering and disposing. If I hadn’t worn it in the last 2 years or didn’t like it, it went into the “giveaway” pile.

I was shocked to realize how much “stuff” was lurking and cluttering up my life.

We Accumulate Unhealthy Habits

There are times we need to STOP and de-clutter our marriages. We don’t realize that over time we accumulate unhealthy habits and destructive behaviours. This last weekend my husband Jack accompanied me on a speaking trip and we spent many hours in the car discussing this topic.

Thought Provoking Suggestions

Over the next 400 kilometres we came up with these thought provoking de-cluttering suggestions:

  • Stop cussing. Swearing and using “bad” words seems to be the norm these days, evening among Christians. We forget that our words have the power to build up or tear down. Let’s use words laced with love and kindness to strengthen our marriages rather than throwing them onto the “giveaway” pile.
  • Don’t expect your spouse to be your self-esteem. It is our individual responsibility to build our strong spiritual foundation.
  • Get a good grasp of your finances so that there is no cause for blame or accusations. De-clutter finance misunderstandings.
  • De-clutter and clarify your unspoken expectations.
  • De-clutter your conversations. Men don’t always know what we’re trying to say when we use our emotions instead of words. Hints and nudges lead to misunderstandings.
  • Remove all late night arguments. Jack and I have an agreement that we do not talk about ANYTHING after 10:00 P.M. that might lead to in-depth conversations either political, finances or anything controversial.Female office worker covering male colleague with sticky notes
  • De-clutter your unnecessary commitments. Often times we commit to too many things and before we know it life is out of control. It’s time to look at it with a magnifying glass and de-clutter.
  • De-clutter your frustrations. Is it an appliance that doesn’t work anymore? Is the garage so full that you can’t find your way to the lawnmower? Are the kitchen knives too dull? Are there too many left-overs in the fridge? Is your closest out of control? A lot of frustrations come when we can’t find things.

Determine your frustrations and eliminate as many as you can. 

These suggestions may seem too simple and practical. Yet, the same way that it brought such beauty and peace to my walk-in closet, these “doable and simple” de-cluttering suggestions can bring a fresh perspective into your marriage. Often times it’s the basic and elementary tasks and tools that actually work.




Posted in: Balancing life, Communication, de-clutter, Expectations, finances, frustrations, good conversation, Good Marriage, happiness, Intimacy, messes, Simple, Understanding each other

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